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Friday, May 28, 2010

Children of the Corn Flakes

Children, it seems, have been used in advertising since it was invented. While I can understand the homey appeal of using innocent looking tots to shill food products, once in a while you come across one that makes you want to reach for a wooden stake. I think a lot of illustrators way back in the day were out of touch with how human children actually looked. Unnatural looking and exaggerated facial expressions were the name of the game. Most of these have found their way to other retro sites, but they're too good not to recycle. I found most of these demonic looking spawns on the ultra cool retro site Plan 59. Don't say I didn't warn you...

Wow, and that's some humdinger of a lipstick you're wearing, kid!

Want your message to get noticed? Include a photo of a redhead with freckles. Unfortunately, this kid looks exactly like the evil Scut Farkus from A Christmas Story.

This child looks absolutely not go near little Johnny when he's eating his Van Camp's beans.

Just plain creepy...the same kid recycled for various products:

This one really bothered me. Was it supposed be funny? If I ever caught a kid dunking my cat in dye, he/she wouldn't live to see their next birthday.


  1. These are hilariously terrifying! Love 'em. I especially like the cowboy eatin' beans, don't know why. Thanks for posting.

  2. Brrr...Kid #1 looks like she's just come back from burning the caretaker alive in his cellar den.

  3. They are all indeed very creepy! I wonder how they attracted customers for this.

  4. overcrowding of freckles = creepy! thanks for all this. fab, freako stuff.

  5. I don't know what looks worse, the kids or the food. Creepy is an understatement.

  6. These ads seem more frightening than a horror movie - I hope that I don't have nightmares about them tonight.

  7. These kids are beyond creepy. Gross.

  8. Oh geez--I want to bitch slap the kitten abuser. These kids are related to Patty McCormick in 'The Bad Seed.' And what was that one devil eating? Raw hamburger? Yummm!

  9. Great comments, everyone.

    Will - I like the cowboy, too...even if he's managed to get bean slop all over his chin.

    I Wonder Wye - yes, bitch slap. As for that second girl, my guess is she likes raw meat because it reminds her of when she's eating her victims.

  10. That has just made me laugh so much! Did nobody at the time stop to REALLY look at them before printing?! Absolutely brilliant.

  11. These are amazing. The demented kid eating Van Camp beans looks like he has just buried his parents in the basement, and is saying ............."your next"


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