Danke Schoen But No Danke Schoen

That's what viewers were saying last night as they kicked off this season's obligatory older dude, Wayne Newton, from Dancing With the Stars.

Don't feel too badly for 65 year-old Mr. Las Vegas, though. Now he can go back to coloring his hair with black shoe polish and collaborating with KD Lang on a biopic of his life. Word on the street is she sucks on helium before saying her lines to achieve that high pitched Newton voice.

Just kidding, of course! Newton seemed like a really nice guy but simply incapable of doing anything more than shuffling about the dance floor. Even other older contestants such as George Hamilton and Jerry Springer had more pinache.

But is it just me, or has Wayne never been seen in the same room as KD? I'm nearly convinced that she's his secret love child.